ADOPTION STORIES : The Perfect Match Awaits
Submitted by : Marie-Pierre Godin
On this Adoption Awareness month, I can’t help but think about our adoption journey : 9 years of waiting... every bits of it led to the family life we now have. Was it easy? Absolutely not! Was it worth it? Most definitely!
We started out by putting our name on the baby’s (0-2) list. You see, we wanted a “perfect” baby. To live through the entire experience of raising a child, to put the chances on our side to build a strong, secure attachment. Were we mean, judgmental and selfish? Absolutely, 100%! And we would like to formally apologize to all the children in waiting for that.
We then (quickly) realized that we were getting old 😂 and the older we got, we realized the less we wanted a baby. Adoption is like that, it gives you spins, hard conversations, growth, but love is always present. So we started re-evaluating our “perfect child”.
We went from wanting a baby to:
🔹Wanting a sibling group
🔹Ages 2 and up
🔹With some health difficulties
🔹But no physical impediment
And boy were those conversations ever tough. No parent having a biological child have the need to have those conversations, it can get soooo frustrating. No parent having a biological child can make choices while having these conversations, how privileged are we? ☺️
We went through all the steps...
🔹First adoption Trimester: PRIDE
🔹Second adoption Trimester: Home study
Oh my god, WE ARE GETTING SO CLOSE!!
🔹Third adoption trimester: the match ❤️❤️
The match was perfect ❤️ it didn’t fit all our criteria 🤷♀️ 😂😂but they were the best fit FOR US. The social worker knew that, even if we didn’t when we first got adoption-pregnant. That was also a growth moment for us.
Both our children have special needs. One teaches us to not take for granted the ability to get from one place to the other with ease. (Remember we said no physical limitations? Yeah well we were wrong!!) The second on how to break down self made barriers. Both are teaching us the meaning of caring, unconditional love, and living in the moment. Both are perfect in every way.
They also come with a community support system (foster parents are mamie and papi/relief family are aunt and uncle). And although navigating these new relationships sometimes meant we had to be vulnerable on all ends, we are now thankful for them everyday.
We will leave you with this:
Re-evaluate your criteria every year. Think about the possible children in waiting. All of them want and need a home. Know that you can do it and that you will be a marvelous parent to YOUR child/ren... whatever difficulty your child/ren has/ve to go through. Do not undervalue yourself, your support system, and your child/ren in waiting... go for it... the perfect match awaits. ❤️